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Conversation With A Stranger. Subject: Suicide


You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You and the stranger both like suicide.

You: hi

You: hello?

Stranger: hi

Stranger: are you all right?

You: no

You: are you?

Stranger: meh im all right

Stranger: i had a migraine all day

Stranger: but its getting better now

You: that’s awesome to hear

Stranger: yeah i guess

Stranger: so now im on here trying to make it seem like i was at least a tiny bit social today

You: that’s awesome. coming here takes some courage

Stranger: for some people it does

Stranger: for others its just perversion

Stranger: but its good to know that there is also an informal support network for people who need it

Stranger: how was your day?

You: my day was ok until tonight

Stranger: oh no

Stranger: what happened?

You: i just finished talking to a guy that lives near my area, and we kind of made a suicide pact.

Stranger: well that’s no good

Stranger: i really hope you dont do that

You: part of me wants to part of me doesn’t. but he wants to, has the plan and everything

Stranger: well you should not let his decision affect you because its your life and you really only have this plane of existence to make your life better or worse

Stranger: theres no going back once you leave this plane

You: but in some places its against the law not to go through with it

Stranger: you mean to attempt it and fail?

Stranger: suicide itself is against the law too

You: it is?

Stranger: but they cant reprimand you if youre already dead

You: no i mean if i say i want to die with someone, and they die but i don’t because i changed my mind i could get arrested for helping or something

Stranger: yes

Stranger: that’s true everyehwre

Stranger: but you havent made a pact with him theres no way to legally do that so

Stranger: dont worry

Stranger: really you arent obligated to go through with it no matter what anyone says

You: i would still feel bad

Stranger: not as bad as your family would feel if you left them just because you felt obligated to follow a stranger into death

Stranger: you have to think it through and make your own decision

Stranger: he has no right to tell you to follow him

You: being blamed for someones death doesn’t feel good either. knowing you let someone die.

you’re saying really awesome stuff

Stranger: you cant do anything for him if he really wants to go through with it

Stranger: you wont be blamed, and you will be blamed moreso if you instigate his actions by helping him have the courage to do it

Stranger: instead what you should really do is try to show him how to be strong by NOT going through with it

You: i see what you mean.

Stranger: why do you want to die so badly?

You: because im not going to do good in the future.

Stranger: i feel the same way

Stranger: i feel hopeless to stop my inevitable regression

Stranger: but you dont know that for sure, if you know what i mean

Stranger: you can always change things

Stranger: and there are people who need you

Stranger: part of being healthy is not caring for yourself as much as you do for others

You: people that need me?

You: do you want to die too then?

Stranger: of course

Stranger: we all do

Stranger: but the trick is not letting your worst days get the better of you

Stranger: so you can live to see better days

Stranger: which WILL come

You: would you mind if i shared this conversation with others?

Stranger: of course

Stranger: that would be fine

Stranger: i just hope you can listen to yourself in your better moments

You: cool

You: what makes you happy?

Stranger: lots of things

Stranger: being in nature, helping others, learning what interests me, trying to make a difference

Stranger: sometimes nothing makes me happy

Stranger: and i feel paralyzed

You: i understand what that’s like.

You: so do you feel like dying right now, or are you ok

Stranger: when i come on here i try to help other people and that makes me feel better about myself

Stranger: im okay now ive just got a hurt back and i hate taking pain meds beause they make me feel so strange

You: does helping others ever make you feel worse?

You: that happens to me sometimes when i cant help

Stranger: well then you have to think about why you arent able to help

Stranger: is it because you dont understand their problem?

Stranger: in those cases you have to try to directly help yourself

Stranger: just be realistic and set it up like an experiment

Stranger: self analysis is really hard

Stranger: do you know how you would like do commit suicide

Stranger: ?

You: i have different ideas of how i would like to, but im not sure if any of them would really work successfully. i have attempted before

Stranger: i have never attemtped it

Stranger: only because i know i would not fail if i did try

You: sometimes i think that, when i think about certain ways of doing it. but i hear stories of how it doesn’t always work..

Stranger: which ways do you consider?

You: i think the sure-fire way would be a gun.
the second way would be pills.
The third way would be drinking a combination of things not meant for consumption.

You: and the way that could just end wrong would be jumping off something.

You: oh! setting yourself on fire would work, but that’s a lot of pain to go through

You: i learned that today.

Stranger: i always wanted to jump off this one cliff that i know

Stranger: it’s about 700 feet down onto jagged rocks

Stranger: theres no way you would live through it

Stranger: but who are we to decide that we cant be alive anymore

Stranger: why not give your life to a better cause

You: how about wait till you’re like super old? then if by 100 you still feel the same then do it

Stranger: fuck that

Stranger: by then i wont need to kill myself

Stranger: i will have been ddead for years already ahha

You: aim for 100 , some people make it past that which is pretty awesome

Stranger: yeah my great aunt was 106

Stranger: my great grandmother ws 101

You: wow, that’s cool

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say something, anything at all. i would love to hear from you :) if not, have an awesome day anyway!

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