Fly1623's Blog…..I like Cake

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“Life is precious”


“You shouldn’t want to wake up and kill yourself. That’s not what you were meant to do. Life is precious. We protect life, that’s what all the hospitals and doctors are for. Saving the tiny little babies, that are precious. Life is precious. You shouldn’t want to snuff out the precious life you have.”

“I am just trying to make a point. Life is precious.”

“Life is a vacation. Some people take the vacation in Florida, Colorado, or the Bahamas. There are going to be hard times. Sometimes you might get a crappy hotel. The car breaks down, the plane won’t start, or the cruise ship stops. Not all of the vacation is going to be paradise. Enjoy life. ”

“Give yourself pats on the back. You are getting good grades, you are going to college, and you want to become a social worker. How many people go to college? Not many.”

“What are your goals?  How about to not have suicidal thoughts? To not get hospitalized again? To not have a suicide attempt?”

“The goal of the medication is for you not to think about suicide anymore. You know yourself the best, do you want to continue?”

– Words from my psychiatrist.

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

She looked me straight in the eye, with genuine concern and smiles. I just responded with ‘Ok’ and smiled back.

I didn’t tell her everything, I couldn’t with my mom in the room.. I don’t want my mom to know.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

I thought about editing it so it would seem like it could fit to the general person who read it, but that wouldn’t be right because it wouldn’t be her actual words.   I hope if you read this, that you think about yourself and maybe consider getting help if you need it.

I kind of forgot a lot of what she said, it was a long ride back home and on the way I wished that I had recorded it so I could type the exact things, but hopefully you understand what I am trying to convey here.

You are awesome, and thank you for reading. I hope that you continue doing awesome, and I will try as hard as I can to continue living.. as I try, you will notice through my writing how I am doing.  I try to be honest here so it can help someone.

 

 

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